I recently read a book by Harville Hendrix called "Getting the Love You Want" and while I can't say that it is the holy grail of relationship self-help books, I have to admit parts of it were very interesting! It talks about how at first with a new relationship your in the "romantic" love phase but then the next phase is "the power struggle" and if you don't find a way to resolve the power struggle you will have no chance at a satisfying relationship.
So.. What is the power struggle? It happens in every relationship, you start to sense you're being held to a set of expectations you didn't really know existed, you're shocked by things your partner does or says and maybe you even start feeling a little betrayed, like your partner misled you and they are not the person you believed they were.
The power struggle will surly continue to the bitter end leaving you in despair, no more hopes of being happy together or loving each other like they do in the movies and all hope at a truly satisfying relationship are gone. That is unless you manage to resolve it before that happens!